"I would gladly make that happen."
*sigh* ya know.. it makes me sad that you're not here. I never knew how hard it was to wait for something like this. Like this time, I know something is going to happen. That's the big difference. Before, I waited for something that would NEVER happen. That I held on for because something inside me hoped that things would just change and work out the way I want it to be. But this time, I KNOW something I want IS going to happen, but waiting for it just sucks. It sucks to know how much I like you, to know that I want to be with you so badly, and to know that I want to talk to you like every minute of my day but I can't. It just sucks. But as much as it sucks ass, one thing I know for sure.. This endless waiting that sucks so much will all be worth it in the end.
That quote Julie told me in 8th grade was pretty accurate, "In order to get the rainbow, you have to put up with the rain." And it's true. I put up with so much shit my junior year, I went through depression, and the fighting, and the drifting friendships, and a whole mess in one school year but after I just gave up on everything.. when I was at that point where I KNEW I had to let go of everything that weighed me down Aaron came along. He was the perfect person to change my life. Like he literally did. After meeting Aaron, my life changed. I see things in a more positive way and I haven't had a mind set like that in a very long time. I'm happier now. I don't let shit phase me like I used to. I mean yeah, I still get pissed off at my mom but that's never going to change but other than that, all these other things I'd expect to bring me down, just.. don't. I don't let it because at those moments, I think about the one thing that could make me smile.. the one thing that could brighten my day and that's Aaron. So I guess good things DO come to those who wait and put up with shit. I mean in the end it's just YOU alone who needs to get back up and do you for once and maybe then you'll get what you've wanted. In my opinion at least.
